Ghosted by the ministry of relations

I try not to take it personally but sometimes, in my darkest moments, I suspect that Naledi Pandor doesn’t love me. It happens in the small hours of the morning when the world is quiet and I’m at my most vulnerable, when I wonder if she even cares about me at all, and if I mean anything to her. Those are the times when the words of all of 80s group Air Supply’s songs feel the most real.

“I’m lying alone with my head on the phone thinking of you till it hurts.”

As South Africa’s minister of international relations and cooperation (Dirco), and with the actual word “relation” in her title, I would have thought she would have been a little more skilled at the whole communication thing. And yet, time and time again, her department ghosts me.

They never call. They hardly write, and even when they do agree to speak to me, they either cancel or they stand me up. I’m beginning to suspect that they don’t want to chat.

Which is surprising given that they are quick to communicate when they choose to.

Following the latest conflict in Gaza, both Dirco and the African National Congress were quick to make statements condemning Israel for most of the evil in the world. (If they can use poetic license, then so can I.)

My morning show producer contacted them to arrange an interview in which we could debate the legitimacy of what they had written. Unfortunately, and even understandably, they were busy with the visit by United States Secretary of State Antony Blinken, who was in South Africa. I imagine he was here in an attempt to illustrate to the “Minister of Relationships” why her attraction to the bad boys like Russia will bring her no joy.

The department promised to catch up with us as soon as he had left and it had caught its breath.

And then Blinken left, and we contacted them again. Only this time, we called Dirco spokesperson Clayson Monyela from a blocked line, meaning he couldn’t see who was trying to contact him. Which is likely why he answered the phone and why, out of embarrassment, he agreed to speak to me on air the next morning.

Only, when we called him at the arranged time, he killed the call. And then killed his phone, leaving us no way to get hold of him.

Imagine if I were sensitive?

The fact that Dirco chooses to not speak with a community radio station in of itself speaks volumes. Dirco is the foreign ministry of the South African government. It’s responsible for South Africa’s relationships with foreign countries and international organisations, and runs South Africa’s diplomatic missions. In essence, it represents us. And it’s meant to reflect the values and ideals of South Africa.

Like any government department, it’s also answerable to the electorate.

I don’t know why Pandor has ended the relationship with me and the Jewish community. I don’t know why she’s chosen to alienate and demonise Israel. What I do know is that her views already matter little to anyone outside of the country, and that it won’t be long until it matters nought to those of us who used to care.