A rabbi’s battle to give a man a Jewish burial

An Umhlanga rabbi will make sure an old man’s memory is kept alive thanks to a pair of tefillin and a tallis found in his room at the Jewish retirement home where he lived.

Rabbi Shlomo Wainer of Chabad of Umhlanga will see to it that these religious items, belonging to the late Oscar Voight, 101, will be worn every day to honour the centenarian’s memory.

This after Wainer lost an urgent court bid last week in the Durban High Court to ensure Voight be buried according to Jewish law. Wainer was trying to prevent him being cremated as was stipulated in his last will and testament, which was written when he was in his nineties. Jewish law mandates that human remains be buried after death, and this has been the dominant Jewish practice for millennia.

Voight was cremated after acting judge Ian Topping ruled that he couldn’t grant Wainer’s application because Voight, who died on 15 November, had left a will saying he wanted to be cremated. The retired engineer, who had worked for a scrap metal company in KwaZulu-Natal, had no surviving close relatives.

Voight and Wainer became acquainted five years ago when Wainer arranged for Voight – then 95 – to move into the Beth Shalom Jewish Retirement Home in Durban. The old man’s pension had fallen behind inflation and was no longer sufficient to cover his expenses, and he was experiencing some difficulties.

“I remember meeting him at his Warner Beach flat. He was a bright guy in good health, nicely dressed, and we spent a while talking. We later put on tefillin, the first time he had done so since his Barmitzvah, and it was very emotional for us,” said Wainer this week.

Wainer verified with the Beth Din that Voight was Jewish, and set out to assist him with communal support.

According to records, Voight’s Hebrew name was Asher ben Shmuel Moshe. He was born on 21 January 1919 in the Free State, before his parents, Max and Sarah, moved to Cape Town where he was raised and had a Barmitzvah.

He met his wife Rebecca “Ruby” Karpelowsky while living in Johannesburg, and they were married in the Yeoville Street Shul on 14 June 1955. The couple had no children. They weren’t a religiously observant couple, and lived in Amanzimtoti and later Warner Beach removed from the Jewish community.

When his only sister passed away, Voight attended to her funeral arrangements and made sure she was buried according to Jewish law in Johannesburg.

Voight and Wainer formed a special bond, and enjoyed pleasant interludes with one another at the home during the rabbi’s regular visits.

“He wasn’t very sociable, more private, but I used to go up to his room and spend time with him. When he turned 100, we put on tefillin together,” said Wainer this week.

“I believe Oscar would have chosen a Jewish burial had we discussed it,” Wainer told the SA Jewish Report.

According to him, Voight identified with his Jewish heritage and enjoyed experiencing Jewish life and its traditions once at the home. He has fond memories laying tefillin with him several times, and doing things like shaking the lulav and etrog during Sukkot.

He last saw Voight before the nationwide lockdown, when visitation restrictions were imposed due to the COVID-19 pandemic. According to him, Voight was healthy and strong, so he was very upset when he heard of his passing.

“It was a shock in and of itself to hear he had passed away. It really jolted me when I heard he had a will and that he wanted to be cremated, something that Judaism abhors,” said the rabbi.

“Straight away, I realised this was going to be a massive challenge because once it’s in a will it’s a legal document and it’s very difficult to change.

“I knew I needed a miracle,” he said, but this didn’t deter the rabbi, who pulled out all the stops, managing to delay the cremation until the judge had made his ruling.

He said Voight didn’t have an estate, so his decision could have been based on cost.

“A cremation costs far less than a funeral, and possibly Oscar didn’t want to be a burden to anybody. He was a simple, unassuming guy. I assume it would have been on the shoulders of the community, and therefore he didn’t want to put anybody out. His wife was also cremated some time ago, and this is possibly another reason for his decision. These are the only reasons I could think of,” said Wainer.

According to those who knew him at the home, Voight was a private and humble man. He wanted to go quietly without a fuss. He even chose not to have a death notice in the papers.

“The lesson I think everyone can learn from this isn’t to separate oneself from the community. One should try to be part of a community, and feel connected to it. Oscar came to KwaZulu-Natal as an engineer and worked for the same company for 40 years. During that time he had little to no contact with Jewish people,” said Wainer.

Wainer said people should stipulate in their will the desire to be buried “because that’s the Jewish way”.

“It’s not a matter of being Orthodox, Reform, Progressive, conservative, gay, or lesbian – this of no concern. If a person is a Jew, they should be buried as a Jew. Irrespective of who we are when it comes to the end of life, we should be buried. The body is a holy vehicle, a vessel for the soul. We are souls with a body, not a body with a soul. This vehicle needs to be looked after and honoured with dignity.”

The Torah and Jewish tradition is consistently pro-burial, considering the burning of the body a violation of the person’s memory and G-d’s image. Reform Judaism still favours burial, but doesn’t oppose cremation. Cremation has become more popular in recent years for a number of reasons.

According to Karen Krausey, the chairperson of the Progressive Chevrah Kadisha, Voight’s remains will be interred at the Red Hill Jewish Cemetery.

“We have received his remains. This was an unusual situation. It has happened many times in the past, but this is the first time we have seen the matter going to court. We have to abide by the decision of the court. The deceased’s last will and testament was witnessed, dated, and signed, and it stood up in a court of law.

“I would have loved to have seen him, maybe spoken to him, heard his last few words, to have said the Shema with him, but unfortunately this didn’t happen,” said Wainer.