Being a ‘mane’ man – beards make a comeback

From stubble to a full-blown beard, 86% of singles prefer their men to have facial hair, according to a recent Dating.com survey, but keeping it well-groomed is a must. With a rising number of men seeking beard transplants and a growing prevalence of males frequenting barbershops for beard maintenance, it seems the trend is catching on.

A snap poll of women in the community reinforced these findings. “I like a beard on a man,” said one respondent. “I think if he goes to a barber and has it trimmed and manscaped, then it looks really nice, professional, and quite sexy. If men look after their beards, then the hair is soft and not so scratchy on your face. Obviously, it doesn’t suit every man, but it suits my man!”

Many emphasised the need for neatness. “Short stubble looks nice,” one woman said, “anything longer looks unkempt.” Another respondent even cast doubt on the trustworthiness of men without facial hair. “Beards and any facial hair are more rugged and manly somehow, cleanshaven is too ‘smooth’,” she said. Some respondents, however, did prefer their man’s face to be a hair-free zone.

Regardless of societal preferences, not all men are able to grow a full beard, and some find their efforts are always uneven. Enter the beard transplant. This allows men to design a tailormade beard and moustache which is then transplanted under topical anaesthetic. It’s a relatively simple and almost painless procedure that uses their own hair follicles.

“There’s been a surge in the number of patients consulting us for beard transplants, which has become more common particularly in the past two years,” says Dr Kashmal Kalan, the medical director of leading hair restoration clinic Alvi Armani South Africa situated in Sandton. “Gents in their late 20s to early 40s are the most common age group consulting us for beard transplants. This is becoming a common trend across all ethnicities, especially in the Caucasian population.”

Kalan says in his experience, the desire for a fuller and thicker beard is rooted in a man’s desire to appear more masculine. “Men who cannot grow a full beard often feel like their masculinity is taken away – almost like a male lion without his mane. As much as make-up is a nice accessory for females, a well-groomed beard is almost ‘make-up’ for a male. A lot of people have patchy beards, especially on the cheek areas and this has become the most common reason for undergoing the procedure.”

Cape Town-based sex coach, Nicki Brivik explains why facial hair is generally considered to be a mark of masculinity. “Beards have always been in vogue because they’re an obvious sign of virility and sexual maturity,” she says. Studies have found that men who have light stubble are the most attractive, she says, which is less aggressive but still shows your virility.

Interestingly, she says, facial hair seems to be more desirable among single women, with many in long-term relationships indicating that they prefer their partners to be cleanshaven. “Maybe that’s because now that you’ve got them to settle down, you don’t want them to be as attractive to other women,” she laughs. It also may have something to do with the discomfort of kissing a man with a scratchy beard.

Nonetheless, the rise in the popularity of beards is also about fashion, Brivik says, pointing out that such trends are more nuanced than the results of studies. “People today are enjoying showing their individuality more, and there’s an acceptance of men paying attention to their looks. Whereas it never used to be very masculine to do that, now it’s like a badge of honour to go to increasingly popular barbershops for some grooming, whether it’s for a beard or hair trim or a brow, ear, or nose wax.”

Women today like men to pay attention to what they look like, and it’s almost expected, Brivik says. There’s a perception that if you take care of yourself, you’ll take care of them. “My clients also often say, ‘Why should I look after myself if he doesn’t look after himself?’ which is also why they find men who take care of themselves attractive. Liking what you look like and who you are is sexy to someone else, it gives you confidence and makes you feel good.”

Indeed, says Kalan, beard transplants are intrinsically linked to self-image. “A lot of patients have been bullied and ridiculed for not being able to grow a beard, and this affects their self-confidence and self-esteem,” he says. As Brivik points out, “beard transplants say more about the man’s view of himself than about what women find attractive”.

Regardless, people nowadays are more open to variety, which wasn’t the case before, especially when it came to men, Brivik says. “We were so, ‘this is the way it should be’ and there was only stubble, or a full beard, and you would fit into a certain culture. Now people don’t necessarily pigeonhole you, there’s an openness to men having any kind of facial hair – or none at all – and allowing change and variety.”

However, one arena where beard trends have remained fairly stable is among Orthodox Jews, particularly rabbis. According to Rabbi Ari Kievman of Chabad Sandton Central, the origin of this can be traced back to the Torah, which forbids “destroying” the edge of our beards.

“Beards are a staple of the hasidic appearance,” says Kievman. “However, there are many who are pious and don’t have a beard.”

While, in Judaism, it’s forbidden to shave with a blade, meaning that a razor is forbidden for men, there are ways around this today. “There’s much halachic discussion on which specific electric shavers are permitted based on their mechanisms,” says Kievman.

The Talmud refers to beards as hadrat panim (splendour of the face), suggesting that Judaism perceives beards as attractive, Kievman says. Yet, he acknowledges that such perceptions come down to personal preferences.

Ultimately, the mark of a man is not his physical appearance but rather how he conducts himself. This is reflected in an anecdote Kievman shares about a chassid who once questioned the Satmar Rebbe about the religiosity of another Jew who didn’t have a beard. The Rebbe’s response was telling. “When he comes to heaven they may ask, ‘Jew, Jew, where was your beard?’ But, when you come before the Heavenly throne, they will ask you, ‘Beard, beard, where was your Jew?’”