Bereaved mom finds true north with leadership academy

Israeli soldier Regev Reef Amar dreamt of becoming prime minister of Israel one day and always told his friends and family he was prepared to die for his country.

He was killed by Hamas terrorists on 7 October last year, just two weeks before his 21st birthday.

Regev also dreamt of visiting South Africa, the birthplace of his mother, Gilanit, and his beloved grandparents, Tamara, and the late Zammy Reef, who lived in Sandringham before making aliya in 1974, settling in Herzliya.

“He insisted on using my maiden name, Reef, as his surname,” said Gilanit, to retain a bit of her history and connection to South Africa.

Regev, a staff sergeant in the Israel Defense Forces, is said to have saved many lives on that Black Sabbath, when Hamas terrorists infiltrated the Israeli border to go on a killing spree.

He was stationed at Bislach Yerucham in the south, serving as a combat soldier in the 101st Battalion of the Paratroopers Brigade, when news of the massacre along the Gaza border erupted. He was sent by his unit to kibbutz Kissufim, one of the worst effected, to rescue civilians from further attack. It’s understood that he continued fighting even though he had been shot himself.

“When soldiers wanted to rescue him from the gunfire, he told them not to go near him because he knew they would be shot and killed,” said Gilanit. Instead, he continued to fight alone.

The Friends of the Israel Defense Forces reiterated this, saying that Regev “kept his comrades from rescuing him, knowing their own lives would be at risk”.

“He was severely injured by a hand grenade, but it was a rocket-propelled grenade which finally killed him. He fought valiantly until the very end,” said Gilanit.

Regev has been hailed a hero by his community in kibbutz Sde Nehemia in northern Israel.

The kibbutz is 4km from the Lebanon border, and experiences at least two red alert sirens a day.

“We’re living in a war zone. We can sometimes hear the bombs going off from Lebanon before the sirens sound for us to be in our bomb shelters,” said Gilanit.

“We have zero seconds to get to a shelter. Sadly, this has become a way of life for those of us who have chosen to stay here,” she said. “People aren’t allowed to gather in groups of more than 30.”

About 40% of the kibbutz has left the area for safety’s sake, and only 700 of the 1 370 residents have returned.

In the past, residents of kibbutz Sde Nehemia would shop, bank, or visit doctors in nearby Kiryat Shmona, however the town has been evacuated, which means they now have to travel more than an hour to Tiberius. “It’s not easy because we cannot leave our homes for long, and must always be near a bomb shelter,” said Gilanit.

“My husband, David, and I won’t leave the north. Our son is buried here,” she said.

“A lot of our neighbours have left. My mom lived with us until 7 October, but she has moved to a retirement home further south because we were afraid that she couldn’t run fast enough to a bomb shelter.”

Her mother, Tamara Reef, was a teacher in South Africa and taught at Dawnview and Edenvale High School. Her late sister, Anita Poplak, taught Grade 6 at King David Linksfield for more than 40 years.

“I came to South Africa for my Batmitzvah,” said Gilanit.

A leadership academy for young adults is being established in kibbutz Sde Nehemia in Regev’s memory, she told the SA Jewish Report.

The Derech Regev leadership academy for young adults aims to impart the values of the late Regev, a man who cherished his land, loved his country, enjoyed volunteering, and was dedicated to his community. The academy seeks to teach potential leaders how to embrace the future, develop resilience, and build a better tomorrow. It’s envisioned that the academy will house about 47 young pioneers of the Derech Regev programme each year.

“There are a lot of leadership programmes in Israel, but there’s great need for one in the north where people are living under constant pressure from the war,” Gilanit said.

A fundraising campaign has so far brought in a substantial amount of money, which will go towards renovating two existing buildings which will house the pioneers of the leadership academy and help accommodate children from kindergarten to the age of 17 who will be looked after by participants of the leadership academy. Funds raised will also help to finance infrastructure, electricity supply, and other kibbutz necessities.

Kids and the elderly in the north are finding it difficult to cope with constant bomb threats from Lebanon, Gilanit said. “Retirement villages up north have closed, so many of the elderly need company and activities. The academy will provide this,” she said.

“Participants will visit the elderly and keep them company, help them with computers, do crafts, and sit with them. The elderly say they don’t want to leave the kibbutz which they helped build. They say nothing will push them away, not even Hezbollah.”

Young children will also be looked after while their parents are at work, she said.

“Since my son died, I believe everything is meant to be. If my time comes, it comes. I can’t let fear manage me. It’s easy to be sad the whole day, but my son wouldn’t want that. This leadership programme helps me to wake up in the morning and face the day. I lost a son, but I’m gaining 47 young people each year, who will come here and spread hope.”

Regev is survived by his parents, Gilanit and David, and his two sisters, Roni, 24, who works for the Israel Agency in California, and Shaked, 18.

For those wanting to donate to the Derech Regev Leadership Academy, email gilanit007@gmail.com.