Dogged by antisemitism

I’m becoming increasingly concerned that Penny might be an antisemite. Or that even if she isn’t an overt Jew hater, she harbours a deep seated and latent bias that she’s unaware of.

I suspect that if she is one, it’s a lineage thing. She is, after all, a poodle of the French kind. And in spite of having lived with us since she was a puppy and she was able to leave her family, she hasn’t fully integrated into our very Jewish lifestyle.

I first realised that she wasn’t Jewish because in spite of her penchant for pastry, she never put on weight. Further, she loves her daily exercise but doesn’t post it on Strava. She prefers Britbox to Netflix, and if that wasn’t suspicious in of itself, I’ve noticed that she has her hair done on a Tuesday.

She seems to tolerate us but not really like us. There are times I catch her looking down her very French (poodle) nose, wondering how it was her lot to land up in Glenhazel of all places, and not Bryanston, where her “people” are. She has an “old money” air about her, and seems to consider our ways a little uncouth.

To date, Penny has never so much as acknowledged 7 October, asked us how we are managing, and doesn’t sport a yellow “Bring them home” dog tag – which would make sense – or a yellow collar. It’s like the events of the past nine months matter not a bit to her.

Penny lives amongst us, but feels none of our pain. In spite of our expectation that she does so.

I talked about this with a Catholic colleague, who came to her defence. He explained that if there were to be an attack or a tragedy that befell fellow Catholics in South America, he would of course be saddened. He might relate to it more than to another event, but he would be shocked if someone were to text him to ask him if he was ok. “Why wouldn’t I be?” he would wonder, considering that the South American tragedy had taken place on another continent with no connection to him.

It’s only his exposure to the Jewish community that gave him insight into an alternative, and had him checking up on his Jewish friends. All of whom really appreciated it, but would probably have noted it had he not done so. And so, he argued, I should cut Penny some slack and not take what I perceive as lack of care as anything other than an expression of her own perspective.

We live in a world of our own construct. We surround ourselves by like-minded people, and we work with those in industries we’re drawn to. Our social media algorithms feed us the opinions that we want to hear, we’re offered the products that we like to buy, and we’re sent articles that will be of interest to us.

It’s easy to forget that not everyone’s construct is the same as ours. But for our own sake and for theirs, it’s worth remembering.

I remain unconvinced about Penny. And whereas I’ll try and judge her more favourably, any hint of an encampment in the garden and she can go straight back to Dainfern.