Hostage release puts Israelis through emotional wringer

Since 7 October, living in Israel is a series of paradoxes. If you ever wondered what it’s like to feel a confluence of contradicting emotions, this would be it. In recent weeks, as the first phase of the hostage deal has progressed, we have run the gamut of emotions from deep anxiety to elation that at last, after enduring unimaginable conditions in Gaza, our brothers and sisters are returning home.

As we progress through this initial phase, we are all too aware that not every release will be celebratory. We’re aware that soon we will have to brace ourselves for the body bags containing the remains of hostages who are no longer alive.

There’s no holier mitzvah than the redemption of the captive, however it does come at a massive price. For many in Israel, watching the disproportionate release of Palestinian prisoners, most of them with blood on their hands, is a bitter pill to swallow. Among those that have or are soon to be released, are terrorists who have committed some of the most heinous crimes in Israel’s history. How do you watch the murderers of beloved family members and friends walk free? It’s extremely difficult for many to bear.

Israelis are grappling with conflicting emotions of joy and anger.

After elation, as the week progresses, the anxiety follows, and we await “the list”.

Hamas gives its list of hostages to be released to the government, and as we work our way through the 33 to be released during this first phase, the anxiety and the prayers start to build. Who will be next?

Contrary to the despicable WhatsApp groups that many people reading this follow, we don’t know who is alive or dead. We only know that eight of the list of 33 in this first phase are presumed dead. WhatsApp groups sharing their “lists” are causing immeasurable trauma for the families, all for the measure of clicks and followers.

Every week, we wait for three names: Shiri. Ariel. Kfir. Their fate is still unknown, but as Israel Defense Forces Chief Spokesperson Rear Admiral Daniel Hagari said, we remain “gravely concerned”. Yarden Bibas, released last week, has asked for his family, and there has been no news for him. His pain must be incomprehensible. We wait for the release of Eli Sharabi. Does he know his wife and daughters were murdered on 7 October, or that his brother, Yossi, was murdered in captivity? Our hearts shatter in a million pieces.

Our fears for the Bibas family in no way diminishes the concern we have for all the hostages. We want all of them home. Now!

The elation of release also brings with it outrage at the theatre of the grotesque that Hamas has helped create with the help of Al Jazeera. In a “power” show of pressed uniforms, state of the art cameras, and signage and staging, Hamas members have come out of their tunnels. There is even a woman flinging glitter over the masked terrorists. The aim is to create fear in the heart of every Israeli. The result has been the opposite. We are now more resolved than ever to finish the job. Israelis wonder if the world will finally see what we have been speaking about for 16 months – that Hamas lies, manipulates, and is a master of propaganda. Judging by the response to the atrocities of 7 October, we are more jaded than hopeful. For 16 months, the world has been told by Hamas propagandists that Gazans are suffering from starvation and that Israel has committed genocide, and now it is plain to see, those who bought into the propaganda were fooled, hoodwinked, and made a laughing stock.

The message saying “Nazi Zionism will never win” and others, posted in signage in Hebrew, Arabic, and English, imperceptible to the mainstream media but loud and clear to Israelis and Palestinians, is designed to create fear and anger and rile up the Palestinians. The images of terrified hostages forced to smile and wave before being handed over to a feckless Red Cross is another message, taunting us. After the first initial shock at the spectacle, Israelis are feeling renewed strength and resolve to end this. The hostages are our priority – the living to begin the long process of rehabilitation, the dead laid to eternal rest. Every single one. Our spirit to fight hasn’t been diminished. If the world had any doubts about the monsters of Hamas, their masks have dropped, and they have been exposed in all their sadistic cruelty.

Some are asking, is it all worth it? Have we not just kicked the can further down the road? For Israel to start healing, we need all of our people back. We know the price is heavy and painful. We also know that the sanctity of life is what we hold most sacred, and this is why we have already won.

• Rolene Marks is a Middle East commentator often heard on radio and TV, and the co-founder of Lay of the Land and the SA-Israel Policy Forum.