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‘Impossible is nothing’ – tales of courageous women
Confronting disease, loss, and addiction, five women shared their inspiring stories of courage and determination at a Union of Jewish Women Women’s Day breakfast last week. In doing so, they revealed the power of tapping into their innate strength in the darkest of times.
“It wasn’t a year that that we could have imagined in our wildest dreams,” said nursery school teacher Tammy Jutan. “Yet it’s also the year that we discovered the strength we didn’t know we had.” The day after their youngest son was saved by a passing motorist who saw him trapped under the wheel of a reversing car, Jutan and her husband discovered a lump in their middle son’s abdomen, which after some misdiagnoses was identified as a malignant tumour.
The family were spinning, but it was through the help of Neill Rayne, who became their life coach, that they adopted an optimistic attitude. Rayne, a cancer sufferer himself, who subsequently passed away, told the Jutans they had a choice in how they navigated their son’s diagnosis.
“He told us we could make this journey whatever we wanted it to be, and that not everyone dies from cancer. It forced us to pause and make a conscious decision about the kind of glasses we wanted to wear to get us through this journey.”
Jutan and her husband adopted a positive attitude, especially around their son, who ultimately made a full recovery. “I got dressed and put on makeup every day, and I showed up for him at the paediatric cancer unit,” said Jutan. “It wasn’t an easy year, but we made the choice to get through it the best way we knew how.” In sharing her story, as a tribute to Rayne, Jutan stressed the importance of paying it forward, something he taught her to do.
Rachel Ancer, just 14, shared the stories of the “seven women wonders” who helped her along her journey from being a sick child to a healthy young woman. When she was five years old, Ancer was diagnosed with a rare bone marrow failure condition called Pure Red Cell Aplasia. After more than 50 red blood cell transfusions, she had a lifesaving bone marrow transplant at the age of eight.
“I don’t really see myself as courageous,” said Ancer. “I didn’t have a choice. I had to struggle through a difficult situation, but what made it easier for me were all of the women of courage who helped me along the way. They made an active choice to be brave, and that takes courage.”
Among the women she honoured were her mother, Jean, who fought tirelessly alongside her, and her donor, a Polish woman named Magda, who accompanied a friend to an international bone-marrow donor drive, thought perhaps there was a reason she was there, and decided to register too. “That moment of courage saved my life,” said Ancer.
She also paid tribute to the sisters, nurses, and technicians who shared comfort and strength. “Courageous and compassionate healthcare workers like them, who hold the hands of very sick children with life-threatening illnesses, are the world’s unsung heroes,” she said.
“I realised that impossible is nothing,” said mother and cancer survivor, Hayley Brainin, who in 2020 suddenly could no longer feel any movement from the waist down. An MRI and CT scan revealed a compression fracture as well as multiple malignant lesions along her spine.
For Brainin, walking again was non-negotiable. With the support of a multidisciplinary medical team, she navigated the highs and lows along her journey to a destination she named “Tropical Island Paradise: Walking Again”. Her determination kept her going, and she ultimately walked again and was declared cancer free.
“Through the unknown to turbulent skies and everything in between, I have learned the difference between alive and living,” she said. “Being alive is the beating of a heart and the flickering of an eye. But living is loving every moment and appreciating the journey and all life has to offer.”
Leader, speaker, and educator Thando Madonsela’s passion for empowering woman and children was born of moving “beyond darkness” after the heart breaking loss of her mother. Though such a loss can trap you in darkness, she said, it takes courage to move forward. Madonsela was inspired by her mother who, shortly before she died on Madonsela’s 20th birthday, told her to be a “strong young woman” and wrote, “`You need to love and support one another.”
Left to take care of her younger brother, Madonsela remembered these words and completed her teaching degree which set her on a career path that brings her joy. “My purpose in life is to empower and support women and children,” she said, “to encourage them never to give up and to follow their dreams. They must never allow any situation to trap their gifts and talents.”
The trials faced by self-esteem counsellor, addiction specialist, and global leader Nikki Munitz led her on a life-changing path to find her purpose. Not only did she battle through years of drug addiction, she also served a prison sentence for fraud, a crime fuelled by her addiction.
Fraud, a book about her harrowing experiences and ultimate triumph, will be released later this year. “In addition to committing fraud, I lived my life always feeling like a fraud, like I didn’t belong,” she said. “I put on a great mask, no-one could ever know how I felt inside. I lived most of my life as victim or villain, not as a woman of courage.”
Having lost her father at the age of nine and left with a single mother raising four children, Munitz battled to find her place in the world. “When I was introduced to drugs, I felt that I had found something miraculous, that made me feel confident and like I’d found my tribe. I didn’t realise that it was just a mirage.”
Through multiple rehab stints, two beloved children, a painful divorce, and an overdose, Munitz eventually found the strength to get clean in 2008. Yet, she still faced her prior fraud conviction. When she eventually served her sentence in 2014, she had already turned her life around. Yet, she emerged from prison more lost than before.
“I didn’t have a war to fight anymore, it was just raging inside of me,” she said. “Learning to have a relationship with myself has been my biggest victory. My teenage children have been my biggest teachers and support.”
Reflecting on how she once had less than nothing to now empowering others and sharing her story of hope, Munitz emphasised that “literally anything is possible”.