Succeeding in her dad’s name

King David Linksfield student Danielle Shafer lost her father to cancer almost two weeks before she began her prelims last year. In spite of her loss, Shafer achieved exceptional results in her final matric exams, drawing inspiration from her father and following his example in a way that would doubtless have made him proud.

Shafer was in Grade 7 when her father was diagnosed with kidney cancer in 2015.

“At first, he was still able to work, but as the years progressed, he became bed bound, especially during the last two years,” Shafer says. “The only time he left the house was to go for oncology consultations. For the first few years, he was still capable of looking after himself, but near the end, he required assistance.”

Instead of chemotherapy, Shafer’s father took cancer medication, experiencing constant side effects which led to degeneration of his health.

“The medication made him weak and tired,” she says. “Every day, I would go to my parents’ room and spend a few minutes talking to my dad, but it would only ever be a short chat as he would get tired easily and needed to rest. This was very hard on me and my family as we weren’t able to spend a lot of time with him.”

Following a stroke in December 2019, Shafer’s father was admitted to hospital, making matters more difficult.

“It was hard to see my dad in a hospital bed with all the machinery,” says Shafer. “I always tried to accept the fact that my dad would pass away from cancer, yet he was in this situation because of a stroke caused by the side effects of the cancer medication.”

Shafer and her family visited the hospital daily, but it became especially challenging when her matric year began in January 2020.

“It was hard to come back home, and have reality kick in. Throughout my high school career, I always tried to keep myself busy and I almost used school as an escape where I could focus on something other than my dad,” says Shafer.

“I was worried that people would know about my situation, not because I was embarrassed about it but because I didn’t want people to treat me differently or ask about it. It was too hard to talk about, and as soon as someone would bring it up, I would start to cry.”

Shafer’s father underwent several surgeries, but suffered further strokes as time went on, moving frequently between hospital and home. The pandemic complicated matters further still.

“I worried that I would bring COVID-19 home from school during the weeks that my dad was at home,” says Shafer. “At the beginning of online school, it was hard to concentrate, and I missed lessons due to helping to take care of my dad while he was at home.

“I had always used school as my escape from home, but now school was at home and I could no longer have a break from reality. Eventually, when the matrics were allowed back to school, it became easier to focus, but my dad was getting worse, and I constantly left school early because I couldn’t get through the day.”

Sadly, Shafer’s father passed away in July, the shiva week ending less than two weeks before the start of prelims. In spite of her loss, Shafer drew inspiration from her father as she approached her exams.

“My dad was always invested in my schoolwork and encouraged me to do my best,” she says. “I was motivated to study hard and try my best during prelims. My dad was extremely smart, and received academic honours in school, so he inspired me to study hard and put effort into my work.

“Whenever I would stress about a test or an exam, he was the person I would go to. He would reassure me that I shouldn’t stress because ultimately, it didn’t matter what mark I got, and I knew my work.”

Shafer believes that she coped with her final year because she was determined to do well for her father.

“In spite of all the challenges, it was my dad who inspired me to achieve the highest marks I could,” she says.

Beyond scoring five distinctions, Shafer also got honours for dancing, a passion of many years.

“It was a great success for me because my dad had also received an honours blazer in his matric year, so it felt as if I was following in his footsteps,” she says.

Shafer will study Biomedical Science at the University of the Witwatersrand this year, eager to assist others by discovering new medications, vaccines, and diseases.

“In tough times, it can be hard to stay motivated, but you should always remember what your end point is and what you wish to achieve. In spite of the cliché, things do get easier,” she says.