Lifestyle/Community
Working with paradox
For a change of pace I’m running a three-part series over the next three weeks to share with you some interesting paradoxes we work with at the Chev:
MICHAEL SIEFF
#1 Life in a fishbowl
I have made it a policy and priority to encourage communication with our wonderful community, so that you know what we’re doing at the Chev and have the opportunity to offer feedback and ask questions.
We use many forums – the print media, our own publications, social media, this column, etc. And I’m delighted to say it’s working! We get lots of reaction – mostly positive and encouraging – but sometimes critical and instructive. Which is perfectly fine, considering that for every two Jews you get at least three opinions! It’s in our DNA to debate issues, which I enjoy.
What makes it challenging at times is that our community is small and interconnected. It can be tricky when relationships and roles overlap, become confused, or even a little incestuous.
For example, a staff member who is also the guy on the shul committee; the friend of a welfare recipient who is seated next to me at a wedding; the whisperings of concerned people who want to help but who all too often know only a fragment of the truth – or worse, a distortion of it.
So where, you might ask, is the paradox here? Well, a little knowledge is often dangerous and my lips must be sealed! This balance between transparency and confidentiality is paradoxical.
On the one hand, I stimulate and promote communication and on the other, I have secrets to protect – not my own, other people’s, which makes the ethics all the more crucial. People often make judgements on situations when not in possession of the facts, or offer advice under the same circumstances.
When that happens, what can we do to explain, to clarify? The answer is little, if anything. And that’s a frustration. I want to engage, but full transparency is often not an option. So when I say, “you don’t have all the facts”, it may sound like a cop-out, but it’s not.
What I do know is that people in our community are good. They are motivated to assist to improve matters. But unless they are fully appraised of circumstances, they don’t know the truth, and the truth is frequently convoluted.
To further complicate matters, truth is itself difficult to define and very often subjective – but that’s a whole other story!
May our partnership continue to thrive!
feedback@jhbchev.co.za